Sunday, November 16, 2008

Hockey Vent

I interrupt this normal family friendly site for this hockey vent...rated R.

Okay I know that not everyone loves or even likes hockey. Let me provide you all with some basic rules:

1) Hockey is a loud sport (okay the fans are loud)
2) Hockey is a aggressive sport where blood is rewarded!
3) Hockey fans like 4 lettered words
4) Hockey, like any sport, has rituals

That being said I do appreciate the people that decided going to a Syracuse Crunch game on a friday night might be something fun to do. Everyone is new to the sport at some point.

HOWEVER, (begin Diva Hockey B-t-h mode)

If you decide to accompany a guy to a game in an effort to get into his pants DO NOT roll your eyes at the following:

1) The loud cheers when Derek Dorsett Drops a guy in the corner
2) The Mirasty Chant when we want him to fight a guy
3) The "Goalie goalie you suck" chant that follows a goal
4) The 320 pound drunk 2 rows back tells the ref he is a "fu*king idiot" because the ref didnt see the stick in Clay Wilsons face
5) The 325 pound drunk sitting next to the guy above announcing to the ref every off sides call that was incorrect ... mind you that this guy has probably gone to every game since 76 when he graduated high school and was the star of his high school team (Still telling everyone that he still has it!! Got to love them)
6) The crowds excitement over Big Sexy
7) The use of cowbells

Some additional things to keep in mind "Miss dating Barbie": Not standing when Syracuse enters the ice or scores a goal is so rude. And nobody leaves the game before its over, even if its 1:42 left on the clock and we are up by 2 goals.

With all that being said i must state what happens these rule are broken: We get louder and i ring that cow bell over your pretty little head for everything even the things that i would normally just clap for! And i am pretty sure the F=bomb was used about 25 more times then normal after your "dirty look" which by the way is not that good of a look ... made me laugh!

So "Miss dating Barbie" i hope you enjoyed your date at the crunch. I certainly hope he was worth the 2 minutes in bed, if your stick wasn't in the way! I hope to see you are more game!!


HeatherMarie724 said...

HI!! I absolutly LOVE this blog!! My college finally got a hockey team this year (I know its about damn time) well, they basically suck, but oh well, I still go and cheer as loud as i can! But I totally agree with all of your rules, and so does steph. We have girls at some of the games that don't know anything! and they drive us nuts. By the way, you would love some of the guys that go to our games, they have some of the nastiest cheers ever, and last night one guy actually mooned the game! and no he didn't get kicked out because our school is to cheap to send police officers to keep us in line!

Jenny said...

You go girl! Wish I had been there!